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Fucked Up Stories
Fucked Up Stories

Short Stories That Sound Dumb, Wait a minute.....they are dumb.Dammit, how could I be deceived so....Oh well, Anyway, here they are:

One night me and Josh were really bored so we took a couch from the side of the road and put it in the woods. This story is fuckin pointless.

This youngster named Courtney was pretty drunk one night, and someone told her that they were gonna push her into the pond in Church Road Park*. So instead of getting pushed in, she decided to jump in on her own.

*For anyone who doesn't know, this pond is really dirty and is filled with duck and seagull shit

Me and a couple of chums from Lewisporte were walking around when we saw this saucy kid on a bike. He was swearing at us and shit like that. Then i stole a hockey stick from somebody's lawn and gave it to my friend Justin, he stuck it into the front spoke of the kid's bike and he flipped over the handlebars and landed on his head.

At the Salmon fest, a girl got really drunk. While a guy who is 3 years older than her decided he wanted his dick sucked. She said no, so she started slapping her in the face with it,(his dick). After all that, he started to finger her, where he could only get a half of a finger, or less in her. She started yealling "FUCK ME., FUCK ME" and then he said "REAlly ?" And she said welllllll, i dunno by. He then continued to finger her where she yelled the same thing. And also said "I dunno by" when he asked if she was serious. After all of that, he put on a condom, where he could only get the top part(wheere all of the jiz is supposed to go) in her. He then threw the condom in the trees and took off. He then later said, she has the worst cunt I have ever seen, its like grabbing the back of ur sack.

THats the story...

1.This guy i know, he will remain nameless, took a shit in a playground off of a picnic table and wiped his ass with a candy bar wrapper

2. This guy named Quinnsway from Lewisporte was really drunk one night. He then decided to beg Shannon (the town slut) for a handjob. She was only after g iving him a 10 second handjob when he decided that he wanted to choke his own chicken. He blew his load all over Nitsuj's clean dishes in the sink, and without kowing it, NItsju put them back in the cubboard.

3. One night Quinnsway and Nitsuj got really drunk. Quinnsway had drank a liter UFO, a 26'er of peach shnaps, 3 beer and a half bottle of red wine. The girl they were with at the time named Krystal then began stripping for them (got topless). After that he blanked out. When he(Quinnsway)
woke up he was completely covered in puke. HIs boxers were so thouroughly soaked that he had to throw them away into the woods. He was hungover for 3 days.